Legend of the Earth God; The Grand Golem

Each of the Rogues who had been treated as mere ants by the Michiogre were, just as they were going to be liquefied under the great pulsations of the seismic waves from his very trembling form, saved by the beam of light shot from the Crystal Shard Satellite System that completely vaporized the remaining energy that was tainted. It was a marvel to behold, the power of the Tsuchigami, as well as the spectacle that was made that illuminated the dark depths of the Depthsroot. Realizing that the battle was won, that they survived and that they were now blessed with these awesome powers, they would all cheer in excitement and happiness once they saw that which threatened their existence destroyed by their underground savior of the Earth. Though their city was basically decimated and a quarter of their people had been lost in the battle, at least those that remained had survived the skirmish, and now, there was nothing left to do but to have fun with their powers and rebuild their city with the power of the Earth granted to them.

"WOOO!!! HOORAY!! THREE CHEERS FOR THE TSUCHIGAMI!!!"

The battle for the Underground had been won. "ALRIGHT!!! LET'S PARTY!! LET'S CELEBRATE!!! WOO!!!" They started shouting out all types of celebratory suggestions now, returning to messing with their Powers of the Earth. Since there was no longer a threat, there was nothing stopping them from creating and hopping into their giant mechs, forging their armors and weapons, manipulating their earth and their steel, and whatever other powers over the Earth were bestowed upon them from the old Shinsanity energy they'd collected.

Tsubake chuckled to himself, grinning big and wide after the threat was destroyed and all of the townsfolk were celebrating. "Heheheh, looks like all's well that ends well..." He looked up to the Tsuchigami, of whom he felt eerily connected to, and felt his power waning. "... But I don't think this is over just quite yet..." Tsubake wasn't going to go into the crowd and get into all of their festivities... Though, he might go swipe a thing or two that looked interesting whilst everyone was busy partying. Yeah, that might be something on his 'to-do' list. "Hehehehe~h...!"

The Rogues continued on with their joyous display of their powers, now happy that they could do their flashy stuff, getting right into the feel of what they needed to do by hopping off of buildings, building and/or rebuilding things as they saw fit. Some people wanted to test their powers out in skirmishes against each other, and of course went to seeing 'who was better,' and all such stuff. Even many of the heads of the village were messing around with their new powers.

That is, until they witnessed Primalpha split himself in two. The great light in the air got all of their attention rather immediately, and they would watch in awe as it descended to take on the form of a more normal looking man... Save for the hair, the glow and the monkey tail. "Oooooohhhhhh..." they all moaned in awe and wonder. At the same time, they would witness the new construct being formed, looking up to see how large it was. It was not anywhere near as large as the first one, but still easily towered over their buildings like they were nothing.

"AAAAAH!!!" some cried, "IT'S BACK!!!!" others shouted, "I THOUGHT WE KILLED IT!!??!" And, naturally, they would all go into a panic again. Especially when they saw roots come out of its back, like they were searching for something. Being basically traumatized by the Michiogre's distructive display before, they didn't really trust the likes of this thing at all. "WHAT DO WE DO!?!?" They all turned to the new Tsuchigami that had been reborn, some of them pointing at him, "HIM!! HE'LL SAVE US!! JUST LIKE HE DID WITH THE FIRST ONE!! YEAH!!!"

Just as Tsubake expected, the end of the battle didn't mean the end of this scenario in the slightest, and from the looks of it, things were about to get interesting for the people of Depthsroot. "Whup!! Looks like front row seats to the next flick!! Heheheh~!" He had to say, he was pretty interested in the new form that the Tsuchigami had taken on. He was so dashing with his monkey fur and tail! "Awww yeah! Monkeys comin' back in style!!" He'd hop off of the giant root once used to bind the Michiogre and backflipped onto the ground, nearby where the Tsuchigami touched down, curious and ready to get a closer inspection. For some reason, Tsubake felt strangely... Drawn to his power in a way he wasn't really certain of.

"Uuhhhh.." He said, scratching the back of his head... Not really certain of how to address a ... A god. "... Hey. How'sitgoin?" He would flash a big, wide and goofy grin, shrugging his shoulders and chuckling nervously.

They looked around kinda... In awe and disbelief, but also, at the same time, some of them were just a little bit upset. Just a pinch.

"Sooo, uh... What are we supposed to do about..." they kinda looked around, puzzled, "... All of this Death and Destruction that just RANDOMLY befell us upon YOUR awakening?"

*snickers* "Oh. Oh, wait." *Gets self adjusted* "... Annnd... Here's the Pitch, LadiesandGentlemen..." Tsubake got himself NICE and comfortable on that Root, chillaxin' like nobody's business.

"Oh... My Lor--" someone shouted in the crowd, "Did... Did he just have the thing just... ... EXPLODE HIMSELF all over the-- You saw that, right?"

They remained puzzled, dumbfounded and confused. Someone else stated another obvious and reasonably valid argument, "... Did he just LEAVE us here...?"

"WHY WOULD HE DO THAT?!" someone else shouted in retort to both questions.

"What do we do with the... Monster thing?"



The crowd suddenly got into a stir, some people accidentally using their powers that they had very little control of on each other and on things that they weren't trying to at the time. They were all actually hazardous to themselves and others and if not trained properly could probably end up killing themselves, destroying things they love and all such things haphazardly. Which, some just so happened to do on a minor level, causing issues between two people that weren't actually based on they, themselves, but perhaps circumstances caused by someone else who had no idea what they were doing and accidentally fucked something or someone up.

With a random banana that he wasn't exactly sure where he collect from (must have just accidentally swiped it in the clutch, knowing he was gonna need it later), and just so happened to have it right here and right now in this exact moment that it was necessary for him. "Who~? Me~?" he asked with a goofy curly crafty shifty smile.

This was gonna be hilarious. "Couldn't Be..." he smirked, taking off straight into the cut, "Heh. Then Who~?" Monkey Man wasn't getting caught in the clutch with the 'Clutch Seeing Eyes' and the 'Monkey Maneuverability'. Nah, none of that.

He was going STRAIGHT for the Golem, though. Without a doubt.

The crowd of rogues roared in agreement, each of them stirring up some of their powers that just so happened to haphazardly get in each others way, partially knocking some of them over whilst others ended up heading off in the direction of the Golem, where they'd seen the monkey tailed guy heading. Though a great deal of them basically accidentally toppled themselves over, or attempted to use their powers in a fashion that caused them more calamity than actual assistance, this discombobulated group of ruffians in the underground would basically... Well, all fall to shit.

"GET OUT OF MY WAY, CARL" someone shouted, slapping someone else with a giant metal shield, "SALLY, THAT'S MY FACE!!" another said, dodging a random sword flying through the air. "DID YOU JUST TRY TO PUSH ME OUT OF THE WAY, SAM!?!?" Eventually, they lost their focus on the main goal and started fighting amongst themselves, getting into random skirmishes and basically going ham on each other. Very few of them still stayed focused on their goal, since most of them were trying to get the other one back for either accidentally or purposefully assaulting or getting in their way.

Finishing his banana, he hurled the peel behind him and hop-stepped up the Golem, "Alleeoop~!" latching onto whatever niche he could in order to get a good grip with his hands and footing with his feet, already knowing that the half-wits that could barely use their powers weren't gonna get anywhere near him, let alone figure out how to use their abilities to even try. "Aaaaand now we wait." He said, making himself more than comfortable. "Damn, I shoulda swiped TWO bananas..." He scratched his ass a bit, a little pissed that he didn't. "Let's see how long it takes them to figure this one out... *snicker* Or... *in Fiddy Cent voice* ... Or Die Tryin.' *snicker*" And he was just gonna sit there and watch them, waiting for that perfect moment...

Whilst a majority of them were fighting, the ones that remained focused on the target and not getting wrapped up in petty rivalries and dumbass vengeance between themselves would continue their pursuit, shouting out to him, "YOU KNOW SOMETHING, DON'T YOU!?!? DON'T YOU!!?!?" But, since they weren't paying any attention to the fact that he threw the banana peel down there, the first guy would slip, causing a domino effect and many of the others behind him to trip and slip up, too.

"I'unno. Maaaayyyybeeee." He was trying to hold back his laughter, "I mean, you're gonna hafta be a little bit more specific. I don't quite know exactly what you're talking about, so I couldn't give you a real definite answer anyway." He snickered some more, stomping his foot, "You're... *snicker* You're gonna hafta be a little more direct. I don't uh... *snicker* ...You're just uh... *snicker* being a little too vague for my understanding here, kids." He could barely contain himself, pounding the surface he was sitting on viciously with his fist as though he were about to burst, "You-- *snicker* -- You know I'm just another dumb old monkey. Bakabakabakabakabaka~" He got up and did the 'I'm Just A Stupid Monkey That Doesn't Know Anything' dance to appease them. Hopefully, they would go away and mind their business once they saw he 'Didn't Know Anything.'

They started getting up off their asses, rubbing their backs and butts as the others continued killing each other, only some snapping out of it and joining the rest of the crowd once they got uninterested in trying to avenge themselves for the sake of their feeble pride. "Well, it looks like he doesn't know anything. He's just as lost as we are, guys..."

They groaned, some of them pouting, others getting all frumpy and grumpy. But then, the wise guy said, "HEY WAIT A SECOND. I SAW THIS ON FLCL. ISN'T THIS WAS HARUKO DID TO EVERYONE IN THAT SHOW?!?!" Many of them looked around, having no idea what the fuck FLCL even was, nor who 'Haruko' was. There were a few of them that knew, though, and then that's when they started wising up, too. "HEY. YEAH. YEAH, THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED, ISN'T IT!?!" Now they were really pissed.

"QUIT FUCKING AROUND, WE KNOW YOU KNOW SOMETHING!!! GODDAMN MONKEY, GET DOWN HERE AND HELP US!!!"

"Damn, they're actually sharper than I thought..." he muttered, a bit disappointed, but also kinda pleased with them, "I thought for SURE that would have gotten them off my ass..." He wasn't talkin', regardless. Especially since he didn't know FOR SURE EXACTLY what they were referring to. Yeah. That was gonna be his cover. As long as they didn't ever tell him EXACTLY what the issue was, he wasn't gonna answer the question. "Heh heh heeeeeh~. I am a genie-us." He stood triumphantly, giving himself a thumb's up and smiling, basking in his own thoughtfulness. "Well, enough of that," he said, plopping back down on his ass.

"UH." time for a well placed distraction... "HEY. IT SEEMS LIKE THAT GUY, WHO CLEARLY KNOWS WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT, WHO REFERENCED THAT ANIME THAT THIS WAS SUDDENLY BECOMING LIKE, SEEMS TO KNOW THAT THIS WORLD IS BECOMING LIKE AN ANIME!" He pointed RIGHT at that guy. "YOU SHOULD TOOOOTALLY PAY ALL YOUR ATTENTION TO THAT GUY." He pointed more vigorously. "... Yep. YOU. THAT GUY. RIGHT THERE." Since he clearly WASN'T TALKING, it wasn't like they could get anything from him, anyway. Ain't got nothin on him. "Come on, guys. Does it REEAAAALLY seem like I know something? REEEAAALLY?" He gave him the most innocent and dumb look he could. "RREEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLYYYYYY?"

That guy was starting to make some sense now, especially considering the one of them who shouted out the idea was actually pretty smart, from what they knew about him. "FRED!!!" they cried, "All this time, you knew!?"

Fred: What?! How did-- NO, IT'S HIM!!! DON'T FALL FOR--

"HOW COULD YOU!?" Someone snatched him by his scruff, "WHAT ELSE DO YOU KNOW, FRED?! HOW MUCH HAVE YOU BEEN KEEPING FROM US?!"

"Some of us want to live, Fred." They frowned at him, shaking their heads in disdain, "... Not cool, Fred. Not cool."

Fred: COME ON!!! HE... HE CLEARLY JUST DID IT AGAIN.

"That is an innocent dumb monkey man, Fred. He is in the same boat as us, clearly knowing nothing. And you... You knew we were turning into an anime, and you just... KEPT it from us! *shakes him* WANTED ALL THE POWERS TO YOURSELF, FRED!? HUH!? IS THAT IT, FRED?!?!?

Fred sighed, shaking his fist at the monkey man. "How... Did this even happen...?"

Tsubake looked at how many of those numbers dropped off of his attention, dwindling now into the single digits and he snickered, "Yup, that did it." He would casually slip up onto the back of the Grand Golem, out of sight of the people so that no one 'accidentally' noticed him again, right in 'The Shadow' of the giant thing. He would kick back and laugh his ass off. "Worked like a friggin' charm! UKEKEKEKE~!" But whole time... He wanted that extra banana.

Now with their attention off of Tsubake, they were focusing on the person who they thought knew everything about what to do and how to save them and how to use their newfound powers; Fred.

"So, what else do you know, Fred?!" They shook him, roughed him up a bit, "DO YOU KNOW THE SECRETS!?" They continued to shake him, "HOW TO CONTROL IT!? HOW TO GET MORE!??!?" Someone slapped him, "ANSWER ME, FRED!!!"

Fred: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!? I WAS THERE WHEN WE GOT THE FUCKING POWERS. I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE THAN YOU DO.

"LIES!!!" They were almost ready to string him up and torture him in order to get the info out of him, and knowing them, they weren't above it. "Start talking, Fred, or else we're gonna use what little bit of what we know on YOU!"

Fred, pointing "IT'S THE MONKEY!! HE CLEARL--" he pointed at the spot where Tsubake once was, "LOOK! He's GONE now!! He... He CLEARLY is hiding something and then distracted you with all types of bullshit, then dipped off in the cut!!! COME ON!!!"

"DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT, FRED!!!" they slap him again, "TALK!!" But then, that other guy, Steve, pointed up to where Fred pointed, being just sharp enough to believe him, "NO, WAIT!! HE'S RIGHT!!! THE MONKEY'S GONE!!"

Carl, the one orchestrating this anarchic riot, would drop Fred and scream at the top of his lungs "SON OF A BITCH!!! MOTHER FUCKING MONKEY!!!" He would shake his fist violently "DAMN YOU, MONKEY!! CURSE YOUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!"

Sam: Uh...

Carl: ... Don't you DARE...

Sam: ... *llama voice* But Caaaarrrrrrrrrrrl...

Carl sighs "... Don't..."

Steve: ... We've been duped.

Carl: ... Mother shit.

"Heh heh heeeeh~" he jeered in the shadows, no longer able to be seen nor heard, their attention completely dwindling now as they found out their original primitive methods that USED to work for them just wouldn't with this guy anymore, "Made out like a bandit~!" With 'The Secret Of The Bandit' in his sights, he would chill out here for a little while and do his work in the shadows for a bit whilst he let them duke it out. "Man, they're actually not all that clever." They probably were, but they just didn't know what was going on like Tsubake did. And it sounded like they were just now figuring it out, getting right back to where they started. "Heh heh. Well, at least they aren't fighting anymore. That's a start." Though, he was a little concerned about the Grand Golem being suddenly... Well, inactive. "... But I wonder about this thing? While they collect their lives, I'm gonna just, uh..." I mean, he already had a lot of secrets under his belt, so. Might as well find out a few more about this here Golem, yeah? He would start to walk along the edge of its neck, trying to figure out how to work it... Or see if he could get more power from it... Or... At least figure out what it did...? Hell, SOMETHING.

Carl sighed, face palming, "Okay, so he's just a stupid monkey, no matter WHAT he knows. He... He can be duped just like we can." He began to pace, trying to find a way to lure him out. "All we need is something he wants... Something he can't get on his own that will force him to come into contact with us... If we can lure him out, we can trap him and make him talk, then teach us how to use these powers before we kill ourselves."

Steve: Uh... Too late.

Some of the people, drunk off of their own power, were haphazardly destroying themselves and what remained of their city. Some had already accidentally killed themselves or their power had grown too much for them to control, resulting in them going crazy and doing something reckless, mindless or foolish from the overdose. It was almost like a drug that, with over stimulation, would cause them to drop off like flies.

Carl: ... FUCK. I bet he knew this would happen. FUCKING MONKEY.

Steve: Sooooo... What are we gonna do, Sherlock?

Carl: Well first, we're gonna have to get these idiots under control...

Steve and Carl looked over to the group, watching someone summon a sword and accidentally slaughter himself, trying to impale some guy that looked at him the wrong way. They both sighed.

Steve: ... Orrrrrrr...?

Carl: ... You right. Where's that fucking banana...?

Meanwhile, Sam...

Sam: Everybody, can we PLEASE stop fighting? I know the powers are cool and now you all wanna flex, but clearly... *points to the senseless destruction* It's... It's not getting us anywhere. In fact, we're no better than that giant monster that was destroying us before.

The crowd, moved by Sam's words, suddenly started to hear him out, some of them putting away their powers and turning an ear to him... Others, that were out of earshot, continued to whoop each others' asses and destroy whatever remained of their already crumbling town. Carl and Steve turned around, shocked, but impressed. "Good job, Sam..." they said with a slow clap. "Well, that's under control... *random head flies* ... For the most part."

Carl: ... Now, for the fucking know-it-all bastard keeping all the really GOOD shit from us...

Whilst Tsubake was busy trying to figure out how to work the Grand Golem, he could hear the frustration of the rogues below trying to figure themselves out as well as many other things. He peeked from the corner and sighed, feeling a bit sorry for them. "... Maybe I should help them out with like, a hint or something..." He saw one of the heads fly off in a 'comical mischief' sort of manner, the most intelligent ones of the group getting pissed off with having to deal with the stupid ones. "BAAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!" He couldn't help but laugh, it was just hilarious. "ONLY WHEN THIS STOPS BEING FUNNY, AHAHAHA!!!" It... It had to stop being funny sooner or later...